The basics of end-of-life planning
Kudos to you for coming to this page, it means you are willing to examine a topic that most people willfully ignore, which only leads to greater stress and burdens at a time when you and your loved ones should be focused on loving and caring and being with each other.
What is end-of-life planning?
End-of-life planning is about getting and having all your affairs in order. It involves everything that matters: financial details involving your assets and taking care of dependents, treatment decisions that you are no longer able to make, relationship matters, and wrapping up your life’s work and commitments. If I may be so bold, think of it as your final parting gift.
End-of-life planning is not something you do for yourself; it’s a gift you give to family and loved ones. They will be dealing with the grief and sorrow of losing your presence in their life. Rather than placing another burden on their shoulders, embrace the process and idea of end-of-life planning. It will make your final days more peaceful for everyone. Shining a light on difficult things can be blinding at first, but when you’re willing do the work, it will lead the way to transformation and serenity.
The end of life deserves as much beauty, care and respect as the beginning.
Who is end-of-life planning for?
Human beings. At about 8 billion people in the world, it’s a big market. As mortal beings, each and every one of us will eventually die. Mortality may be the only thing we all have in common.
That said, this information is intended for adult Americans. 41-year-olds should act more urgently than 21-year-olds, but the sooner we all start thinking about this, the better. Nobody is stamped with a specific expiration date, and life can be very unpredictable.
Don’t wait until the end
End-of-life planning is best done when you’re still full of life, and much easier when you take it step-by-step, changing and updating at appropriate times in life, like when you’re getting married, launching a business, or having children.
A dozen important end-of-life documents
I’m not trying to make an already daunting task even more so by giving you TWELVE documents to complete all at once. The good news is that you may not need all of them, and some of them (like life insurance policies or wills) may already be in place. Consider this a helpful reference list.
IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: I am NOT a legal, financial, or medical professional. The information presented here is for general awareness and education only, and should not be used as a substitute for expert advice. Consult with your own advisers to ensure your specific needs and circumstances are met.
I’m putting this at the top, because it’s a must-have for anyone with dependents and best purchased when you’re young and healthy. Many different types of life insurance policies are available and employee benefit packages often include one or more options. People who have been diagnosed with cancer might be able to get life insurance, but options will be limited and you may need to be at a cancer-free stage before you can apply. People with stage 4 cancer will usually qualify only for something known as burial, final expense, or guaranteed issue whole life insurance.
A will will ensure that the physical assets you have, including valuable or valued possessions like the quilt your grandmother made for you, will go to the people or organization you want to have them. Create a will even if you think you’re not wealthy enough to need one or you can’t afford a lawyer. FreeWill is one free, do-it-yourself option anyone can use, and Legal Zoom offers a variety of options that are less costly than hiring an attorney. And of course hire an attorney if have or begin accumulating assets and heirs.
Certain assets are not controlled by a will and not subject to the official validation process of probate. 401(k) and IRA accounts, pensions, and life insurance policies are examples. These assets pass directly to the designated beficiaries you specify to the organization that holds them, like the insurance or financial services company. You should, however, ensure that your designated beneficiaries know about these assets and how to gain access to them upon your death, not relying solely on the asset management companies.
Unlike a will, a revocable living trust (RLT) is a legal entity. Once you set it up, you can transfer assets to it, making the trust the owner. You can be the trustee and still use and manage the property, but you also need to identify both a successor trustee to take over if you become disabled or die and beneficiaries to receive the trust property. RLTs require more management than wills, but they also have advantages. Consult an estate-planning attorney to determine if this is a good option for you.
A medical power of attorney (POA) is a person you choose to be your healthcare proxy to make medical decisions and speak for you about treatments, surgery, medications, and end-of-life care if you become unable to do so yourself. A legal spouse is designated to speak on your behalf, though you can choose someone else. A medical power of attorney is important for people with stage 4 cancer or another life-threatening illness, and this person should be chosen with great care, because medical decisions can be fraught with fear and other emotions. Note that a medical POA does not make financial decisions.
A living will and a medical POA work together, and when they’re combined, they are sometimes referred to as an Advance Healthcare Directive. Both documents outline your healthcare preferences in the event you can’t communicate them yourself. If you have both, the decisions made by your healthcare agent must align with the wishes in your living will. You may not need or want both; discuss with loved ones and consult an attorney for guidance.
A financial power of attorney (POA) is a person you choose to be your agent for important financial obligations and decisions when you can’t make them yourself, like if you slip into a coma or can no longer clearly and adequately communicate your wishes. The word “durable” means this person’s authority continues if you become incapacitated. Note that a Financial POA does not make medical decisions.
A DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order informs healthcare providers that you do not want to be resuscitated in the event of an emergency. It’s possible to buy and wear a medical DNR bracelet or necklace to alert Emergency Medical Technicians (EMTs) and other providers responding an accident or medical emergency, when resuscitative efforts are taken. A POLST (Physician’s Orders for Life Sustaining Treatment) outlines your wishes for end-of-life care and is often adopted with an existing diagnosis like stage 4 cancer.
Where would you like to spend your final days? 80% of Americans would prefer to be at homelm yet 60% die in acute care hospitals, 20% in nursing homes, and only 20% at home. (Source: Stanford School of Medicine) So many factors are at play. Will you receive in-home care from a paid caregiver? Would you move in with adult children or other loved ones? Do they know and agree??? This is another reason why end of life planning is so important. Don’t wait until it’s essentially too late or leave it to chance. We’re talking about the final days of your life.
Why not plan your own funeral or celebration of life? Funeral and burial or cremation instructions aren’t generally legal documents, and a rogue family member could hijack the proceedings, but pre-determined arrangemenbts are useful and appreciated. It’s one less burden on grieving family members and the best way to get the funeral, celebration of life, and final resting place you want.
Social media, email, online banking, streaming services, digital newspapers and magazines. The average American has a lot of digital assets and online accounts. A digital vault or password manager that already keeps track of your logins and passwords is a valuable tool here. All you need is to choose who should have access and shut them down. A digital executor may also be specified in your will to handle this.
Did you know that pets are considered property? If you don’t have a plan for them, and nobody you know and trust steps up to adopt them, they could be placed in a shelter or worse. Avoid this by choosing a caregiver (with their full agreement of course) in your will. If you feel it’s necessary and you have the resources, you should also set aside some money for the cost of their care. Establishing a pet trust will ensure your pets are cared for to your satisfaction.
I hope this summary gives you an idea of the details and documents that you may need, and to help you identify gaps that need filling. Again, it’s important that you consult with professionals and your own trusted advisers to ensure your specific needs and circumstances are met.
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